After Wife’s Demise, Widower Finds Out They’ve Been Divorced for More than 20 Years
Robert sat on his couch, staring blankly at the divorce decree. He was in his up-market beach house, surrounded by memories of Melissa, his wife of 30 years. Her death had been a blow, but finding this document in her belongings was bewildering. He had no memory of ever divorcing her.
He reflected on the accident he’d had years ago, which caused head trauma and a six-month memory gap for him. Reading the document, he realized that it was during that time he had apparently initiated the divorce. “July twenty years ago,” he muttered, noting the date on the document.
They had gone to visit Robert’s parents to introduce Melissa to more of his extended family before the wedding. Robert’s parents offered to host them, and they had been staying in his old room for the sake of nostalgia. Robert had wanted to stay at a hotel, but Melissa thought it would be fun to just have him share her old room with him.
“I don’t see why staying in your childhood home is going to change anything,” Robert told her when they were packing for the trip.
“Because it’s going to be my last time with my parents under their roof before I become a married woman. It’s going to be a sentimental moment,” Melissa replied.
“If it gets uncomfortable, I’m just going to check myself into a hotel,” Robert said casually.
Of course, he didn’t expect what would happen next. They got to his parents’ home, and everyone was excited to see them. His mother and aunt had cooked up an elaborate meal, ready to just sit down at the table and get to know Melissa better. All through dinner, everything went as well as expected, and Melissa happily enjoyed having the attention centered around her.
“This is new for me,” she said as they did the dishes in between the mains and dessert. “I’m not used to having people pay attention to me like this.”
“It’s a good thing,” Robert said, handing her a plate. “You’re supposed to feel welcome and at home with my family, too.”
As the night died down and they all went to bed, ready for a good night’s sleep before the following day’s family outing to the local theme park, Melissa kept disturbing Robert’s sleep.
“What’s going on?” he asked, turning to face her.
“I just can’t sleep, Robert,” she snapped. “It’s not my bed, and I’m not used to sleeping in beds that aren’t my own. And your bed is lumpy and uncomfortable.”
“Just go and take a walk outside,” he grumbled. “The fresh air should make a difference, and you’ll come back and fall asleep.”
“Fine,” she said, getting out of bed and leaving the room.
Robert was just about to fall asleep again when Melissa’s scream pierced the air. He bolted upright in bed with his heart racing.
What on earth was going on? Was there someone in the house? Were they in danger?
While his brain was moving a mile a minute, trying to decide what to do next, Melissa stormed back into the room.
“What happened?” he blurted out, uneasy.
Melissa’s face contorted in a mix of horror and anger, and she paused for a minute before she started yelling.
“I cannot believe it,” she yelled. “Your mom! Robert! Your mother! She’s kissing another man in the foyer!”
Robert’s heart sank. He had hoped that they would have gotten through this entire visit without this. If anything, he had always dreaded this moment, the time when his parents’ unusual and unconventional marriage would come to light. He tried to explain, to calm her down, but she wouldn’t have it.
“Call your dad, Robert,” Melissa demanded. “Tell him that your mom is cheating right here in your own home.”
It seemed logical, simple even. And he understood why Melissa would think that having his father involved would solve everything. But she couldn’t be further from the truth.
Before Robert could react and begin navigating the explanation, his mom walked in, still straightening her clothes.
“I can explain,” she started, but Melissa cut her off.
“Explain? What’s there to explain? You’re cheating on your husband in his own home!”
“It’s not cheating, darling,” she said softly. “Robert knows, and he’ll explain it all to you. Shaun and my marriage is different. Very different. It’s unconventional compared to your usual marriage. You need to understand that, Melissa, before you judge us.”
Melissa turned to Robert, eyes wide.
“You knew? You knew about this, and you didn’t tell me?”
Robert tried to reach out to her, but she recoiled.
“I didn’t know how to tell you, and I’m not proud of keeping this secret. But it wasn’t mine to tell.”
“Robert!” she said, her hands in the air. “You should have told me! This isn’t something that you just keep hidden from the person that you’re going to marry. I don’t know if I can trust you now. This was a setup, wasn’t it? You wanted to introduce me to this lifestyle, isn’t it?”
By this point, Robert was overwhelmed, and he couldn’t understand what Melissa was getting at.
He was taken back to a memory from his youth. He was 16, and his friends were planning a sleepover at his home.
“You have the biggest room, Robert,” his friend Brielle said. “Let’s have it at your place.”
“That’s perfectly fine with me,” he said. “I don’t think my parents will mind at all! And we can watch movies in the living room because my parents have a TV in their room now, so they won’t disturb us.”
“I’ll bring my cotton candy machine,” Brielle said excitedly. “We can have that and popcorn!”
Robert remembered going home after school and telling his mother all about their plans. She smiled and nodded enthusiastically.
“Sure, honey,” she said. “You girls can take care of yourselves. Dad and I have a dinner that evening.”
Little did he know that later that evening, he would discover the truth about his parents’ marriage. His friends and he were all sitting on the couch when his parents walked in with another couple. His mother was holding tightly onto a man’s hand as she kicked off her shoes. His father was kissing the other woman.
When they saw Robert, they were shocked. And they had no choice but to explain the situation to him.
“We are married to each other, and we love each other. We’re committed, honey. But we’re also allowed to see other people if we want to,” his mother explained gently. “There’s nothing wrong with the way we are. And you need to understand that.”
Now, listening to Melissa, Robert was taken back to the same flood of emotions.
“No, it’s nothing like that,” he said. “I am dedicated to you. I don’t want that lifestyle.”
But Melissa wasn’t having it. She just wasn’t listening. Instead, she began to speak about her mother’s infidelity which had led to her parents’ divorce. It all made her see betrayal everywhere.
“Everything is a red flag for me, Robert.”
She packed a bag and left for a hotel, saying that she needed a moment to reevaluate their engagement.
Robert spent the rest of the night crying, feeling the weight of his parents’ choices crashing down on his own relationship.
“You need to talk to her,” his mother said, giving him a cup of coffee. “Just go to her.”
Robert joined her at the hotel. They barely spoke, the silence heavy with everything left unsaid. He didn’t know if Melissa still wanted to be together or not. He suggested that they move to his grandmother’s house for the rest of their stay so that they could talk about everything while still being comfortable.
“Yeah,” she said. “That’s okay with me because this hotel is too cold anyway.”
There was a coldness between them that hadn’t been there before.
“I’ve never kept secrets from you,” Robert told her. “I didn’t know how to bring it up. It’s not something that I like talking about because I struggled to understand it myself.”
Melissa sighed, rubbing her temples.
“I get it. But this feels too close to home, Robert,” she said. “I just need some time.”
They spent the rest of the week at his grandmother’s house, trying to finish the family visit in the best spirits they could muster. His parents apologized to Melissa, but it didn’t matter anymore. It wasn’t about them. It was about the fact that their actions had triggered her. On the drive home, Robert and Melissa decided that they wanted to stay together and see where life took them.
“But I think we need to go to therapy,” Robert said, handing Melissa a drink.
“I think that’s a good idea,” she said, biting her lip. “Because I need to uncover my own trauma before accepting your parents.”
Now, Robert and Melissa have started talking about everything. From her fears, his shame, their future. They could only heal from this.